Sunday, October 17, 2010

"You never realize what you got until its gone"

It seems like ALL my relationships end because of all the dudes have they own shit going on and they say they "Don't have no time for a girlfriend or relationship" trust me I've heard the same shit from ALMOST every ex boyfriend. Its the classic line "its Not you its ME" bullshit, but the thing about it is, I know its not me lol it really must be them

I'm a good person, a GREAT friend I'm the kinda person that I would wanna date, like I'm waiting to find the one person who's just like me on the inside but what I look for in a dude on the outside. When that happends I'll be thee happiest girl in the history of the worldd!

I want quality time, conversation that makes me laugh and smile not that makes me wanna shank myself, and somebody I can spend time with, we don't have to be doing nothing and I'm having a good time. Thats how I felt about the one I loved. The feelings that I feel for my ex is what I want someone to feel for me. When will it come?

I ask God for signs of what to do yet I still get NO answer or maybe I'm gettin an answer but not really paying any attention to it. I'm not sure what to do.

Maybe one day he will do like the rest of my ex's did and come back telling me "I love you Chauntill, I want stupid, selfish an ungrateful and I want you to take me back" that's what I want because I love him so much and I want him to love me too. I just feel in my heart that its not gonna happen... I guess that could be the sign I've been looking for,, who know's... maybe he will wake up one day and come to his senses and think "I'm stupid Chauntill is the one for me, she's sucha good girlfriend and she deserves the best and i messed up i need to apologize" that right there is wat im waiting for..

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